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“But what if?”

April 2, 2013

It’s that time again.

TCAP time.

No, it’s nothing like Hammer Time. It’s the time of year where I nearly lose my mind. Something about the stress of the impending test leaves me feeling like a nervous person who has never successfully spoken to a child. My mind starts racing with “What if?” and “Should I?” Just today, as I sat trying to determine the best course of action for reviewing in the remaining 15 class periods before the test, I was incapable of making a decision.

I’m not sure why this self-imposed stress creates indecisiveness and second guessing. Perhaps it’s because I care that much. Perhaps it’s because there’s no real answer for how it should be done. Perhaps it’s because I’m an overthinker. I don’t know why, I just know it happens, and when it does, I feel like nervous travel agent Judy Grimes.

(Thank you, Kristen Wiig, for reminding me I’m not the only one.)

My students are fantastic learners with incredible mathematical knowledge. This will be my mantra through the end of April. I will say it to myself every time I find myself asking, “But what if?”

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